12/30/08
Leslie and I spent some time today 'looking' to the next 6 months...
Both of us have been 'aware' of something occurring in March; while both of us knew there was the energy of "hope" in March, I have felt that May/June held another shift point.
Today Leslie had client who mentioned the same time frames .... in March, some sort of "announcement" that brings "hope" and by "July 4" we would know the full meaning of the message. That conversation began with the economy and I can only speculate at what is planned by outside powers... but, what is more important to me is that I know what is in my spirit to know.
My spirit wants less and less to do with politics and the media and more and more to do with crafting a long-held vision from the fabric of Love.

Leslie saw me spinning slowly around with my arms wide open... that I was "barefoot on the earth" (how I look forward to that again). She said I was "blessing what I had planted".
Metaphorically, was I "blessing" (activating?) every starseeded thought I have ever planted in the mind-souls of people I've met?
You bet! She said I was "by myself" and then, at the same time, we both said "but not alone", which makes total sense for with every starseed I have planted, a cell from the place I where planted it remained with me.

Ah... there's no escaping it, I am the cosmic mother; the archetype, willingly formed of stardust... and as such, it is my function to birth us into new reality. And the reality I see before us is where magic... the melding of science and art.... sustains me.
Ah... I am aspiring to become my lightbody.... barefooted etheric matter... living light, informed by the power of Love. Light that is conscious of itself... aware of Be-ing.... fed by the living light of Love. This is the reality to which I am moving... uninhibited by denser energy that is asleep in a self-created darkness of ignorance....

How sad the loss of light. I know it's pain for I escaped it... transformed fears to power and gave myself back to me. I led the child out of the cave and back to the living light of hope.
It is in that hope that I choose to reside... within that hope lives the dream of ages. It is the vision I saw as a child. A world of co-operation, a world of interconnection where all our pettiness... our little 'h' human behaviors... were informed by the power of Love, allowing us to transcend them to lighten our lives. We're doing it. Our world awaits our arrival....

Post Holiday

There are times when the crush of humanity's needs weighs me down. A coven-mate once said she wanted to paint me as a "female Atlas" for I do tend to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. Not complaining mind you, just stating the truth of my life. For whatever reason I elected to do this as a service to Love. For the most part I am honored to do so, but there are times when the weight becomes a burden and I long for another set of arms to help with the load. I found, during this lesson, that there are some who willingly lighten the load by just understanding and offering a consoling ear and then there are some who only want to poke the bear while it is annoyed. Makes choice of confidants so much simpler when you see things with such clarity.

Yesterday, while sitting with a friend/fellow reader, I asked him to check with his guides to see just what it was that had weighed me down so heavily during the recent Christmas season. His guidance told him it was about "forgiveness" and when he asked if it was on a personal level, he was surprised to hear from guidance that it was not, but rather an energy from the collective consciousness. He advised me to take a break from "processing" so much of humanity's pain but upon delving further into things, he found that a "break" was not a part of my contract. "Selfless service" is just that... self less.

In thinking about the idea of "forgiveness" I recalled a recent energy message from one of the other intrepid souls who surf the seas of consciousness, culling clues for the rest of us so that we can know we are on course. The message had been about the collective consciousness forgiving, and thereby releasing, the accumulated guilt that resulted from the crucifixtion of Christ. Makes perfect sense to me... for if we are to witness the return of the Christ consciousness, we must clear the field of all that will not feed the energy. While circumstances of my holiday caused me to take all of this personally... something I often advise people not to do... I knew I needed to do something to clear away the collective garbage that had accumulated in my energy field.

After a salt bath and a salt scrub, I feel much more like myself... ready to greet the morning's New Moon with renewed enthusiasm and hope. And it is my wish for all of you that your loads are lightened and your visions made clearer!
Be Blissed for you are love!
PH Sky

Greetings all Powerful Humans out there....
The energy wave we ride will crest with Full Moon occurring at 11:37 am EST on Friday, Dec. 12. A 12/12 "gate" as some call it.... empowered by the light of Her brilliance. Grandmother Moon is pleased with where we are. Here in the US we will not see Her soft, reflected light but will feel the flow of Her tides as She bathes us in Love eternal, healing our inner beings. The last Full Moon of '08, it is a time of collective power, readying us for the 'letting go' cycle we are about to enter as '09 dawns.
I awoke this morning curious about the play of numbers we assign to years; a means of marking that which we don't understand and therefore must frame so that it doesn't frighten us with its' wildness. 8 is all about amassing power and influence and it seems that is what we've been doing this entire year... can you see it in your life? It is certainly apparent in my realm. In this 'darkness' as the Sun prepares to return on Yule, I can see a brighter future as the old paradigm of "power-over" loses its grip in our world. I am ready for the ending of that particular cycle. I witness the rising of Powerful Humans every day. The day of the PH is at hand.... the web-weavers, light-workers, starborne.... all, as we approach the transitional point of our labor, the most challenging aspect of birth.... we have found each other within ourselves. And in each other, we have witnessed how quickly time can fly when we allow it.... when we ride the wave of unconditional Love, we sail away from the pain born of fear. And we carry the essence of Gaia within our spirit hearts.
Light a sacred fire Thursday or Friday, while Grandmother Moon moves across the night sky.... breathe and let spirit move you within....let the flames feed your spirit and She will bless your waking dreams. She says "Prepare my loves... I am lighting your way and the way ahead is clear".
In Love.. in-joy!
PH Sky

Incoming

Greetings fellow Powerful Humans (PH)....
Seems there is new energy headed this way... Due to hit within the next week, it is a bountiful and quite powerful wave, propelling us to actions that will help us shift further into the next phase of our evolution. There's a "get moving" feel to it that I am applying to the physical level, in many areas.
With the success I have experienced with using the Essiac Tea since July, I am moving into the next phase of self-appreciation for my body by following the advice I offered in my recent class on Reclaiming Power... namely, eat seasonally. All Summer I'd lived on a diet of greens, cucumbers, fresh peas and chicken salad. For the last month, I've had no desire for those foods because Autumn has finally arrived in the desert. The cooler weather has fostered cravings for soups and stews, grains and nuts. I'll be posting the new recipes on my recipe blog at: http://phskyrecipes.blogspot.com/
For those of you who, like me, have teeth and/or gum issues, be sure to check out the recipe for crock-pot Museli.
Well, I am headed back to create space, organize chaos and hopefully glide through the rest of my day like the Faery that I am....
Ride the wave as it rises... we're heading home!!!
Bountiful Joy!
PH Joyce/Skyfire

Rage against the machine

Being fearless in a world that is fed only fear lends itself to a soul hunger for justice that is not easily satisfied. Being a front-runner in a world where being a member of a herd is a highly prized conditioned value makes for a loneliness so profound it creates a longing for connection that causes a despair so deep that it is not easily soothed. A cellular knowing of another awareness breeds a frustration bordering on rage when one feels the futility of the herd but is only a singular being trying to turn them away from a dumbfounded march to the slaughterhouse where they will surrender what is left of their freedom to choose.

Yesterday, in testing myself with the Jung-Myers-Briggs personality test, I came up as an INFJ character, an assessment that apparently places me in the one percentile portion of the population. (test here: http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes2.asp ) The interpretation of the results pretty much blew my mind; it was as if I wrote a description of myself... the self few people know. Describing the "fearless front-runner" that I am, it afforded me some comfort but it didn't suggest ways in which I might find the solace I seek in a world such as we currently find ourselves.
For me, there was no choice between the "blue pill or the red pill"... I was born knowing about the Matrix; it's that Intuitive part of the INFJ. But my Goddess, what does one do to halt the death march of the herd? For I believe that is the only answer that will provide relief from the "hunger for justice" and the "longing for connection" that fuels my rage.
Driving my car, I feel the futility and fear of frustrated people who are driving lethal weapons at 75 to 80 MPH. I used to sing to block their energy, now my iPod is my only defense and that armor is thin. Gratefully I only have to work 4 days a week, but it's enough; the rest of the week I feel them flying down the street behind my home. With the current economic situation being what it is, the fear has become so tangible I can almost taste it. It emanates from the psyches of the population, engendering a dark shroud that is easily cast off. The choice is simple: fear or love.
In the last 8 years we have seen the blatant, unrepentant lies of an elite group of people destroy our economy, our pride and our dreams and if the truth be told, these lying bastards are not done with us yet. Political pandering, a profound lack of ethics and greed have created a dark empire within the borders of America. This orchestrated economic situation was designed to cripple We, the People and whether that spineless lot of whores in Congress passes this "bailout" or not, We the People are fucked either way. If they pass it, We will carry not only the burden of a completely illegal and immoral war, but the bailing out of wall street as well. If they don't pass it, then the scenario I envision is that the smaller banks will begin to fail at an exponential rate, allowing Chase, BoA and Citi bank to gobble them up for a song and a dance and then, when all the dust settles, they will merge into one mother of a New World Order financial system... owning everyone who has a credit card and/or debt.

So here is where I channel my rage... on the blank pages of cyberspace... hoping that some who read this will be incited to move further away from the herd and form community.
While indulging in a period of abject vulnerability yesterday, I wondered why I am living in a city when my heart and soul long for the country and the answer is two-fold. First I must be here to feel the intensity of the herd... to feel their futility and fear for that is the fuel that I, as a "thunder being", must eat in order to feed the souls of the rest of you. The second reason is that my life as a "front-runner" who hungers for justice is a life of service to source. To that end, in November I will be opening my home to bi-monthly meetings to begin the process creating a sustainable community here in the Valley of the Sun. Topics will range from food sources to container gardening to self-empowerment through becoming more self-sufficient. The theme will be "Learn to Teach" a simple concept that just may help turn this world around. We each learn something to teach something to others. Please let me know if you want to be included in these meetings.

To those of you outside the Phoenix area, I will be happy to share the resources I find and keep you in the loop... just let me know if you want to be included. For those of you already living a sustainable life, if you have resources to share, please send them.

Be Blissed for you are loved.
PH Joyce

And the winds shall rise

"Fear is the mind-killer" Frank Herbert (Dune)
More & more spirit has been reminding me that there are only two emotions or forces that influence humanity: Love & Fear. They cannot occupy the same space.

When I think back to where I was 13 years ago, I can see evidence of that truth for fear was my primary emotion and my reality reflected that power back to me many times over. More than a decade of subsistence living taught me a great deal about the power of fear as a catalyst. Living below the poverty level, I remained embedded in the "poverty consciousness" that holds people captured in a worn-out paradigm. However, by the grace of the Goddess, I was able to step out of that place of fear and into the space of Love that had been held for me. Now I see a world enslaved by artificial values and I know that our world stands at the threshold of change. Moreover, I see the desire for change manifested in so many hearts.... more and more I witness people opening up to the idea that they hold the power to shift this beautiful world from greed and power-over to a space of Love and power from within.
Fear is the patriarchal weapon of choice.... It is the tool of those who would enslave others; it is the weapon being used by the media every day. It's a far swing of the pendulum from the matriarchal rule of our humble beginnings as field dwellers who looked to the cycles of the seasons for our sustenance. Now the cycles we follow are the swings of the stock market, the real estate market and the price of crude oil. And the cycle within that cycle is about to come full circle as we face a rapidly collapsing economy and a failed experiment in government. And in the face of this current and pending adversity, we cannot allow fear to influence any part of our lives... nor can we allow blissful ignorance to chart the course to our future. It is time, my friends, to step into the power we have held within our hearts for so long. We are, indeed, the ones we've been waiting for. This time is why we were born, why we agreed to touch, to meet and to align ourselves with each other. And now is the time to organize.
Many of you may have already read the articles about the new military brigade scheduled to begin a tour of duty within the US borders on October 1. For those of you who have not read about this links to Army Times and an article by Salon.com are listed here:
Army Times: http://www.armytimes.com/news/2008/09/army_homeland_090708w/ Salon.com http://www.salon.com/opinion/greenwald/2008/09/24/army/index.html
Additionally, there is an article from 2006 that suggests that this door was opened by fine print legislation that altered the Insurrection Act, a 200 year old Congressional act which limited the President's power to use armed forces within the borders of the US; this now allows for the use of martial law.
CQ.com: http://public.cq.com/public/20061201_homeland.html
Now don't get me wrong... I am not writing this from a place of fear, I am writing from a place of complete outrage!!!!!!!! Anger has been an emotion I have long been acquainted with but it is no longer one I will turn on myself. It is now an ally that provides fuel for action.
It has further come to me, by means of the "six degrees of separation" that the current cost of economic recovery is damn near "incalculable" and at best, we may only be 3 months away from a complete collapse. What better reason to clear the way for martial law? Wamu was just the beginning! The "new world order" needs a new world bank and JP Morgan/Chase is the bully on the block. Wamu's $300 billion in assets were seized and subsequently purchased by JP Morgan for a mere $1.9 billion. The CEO of Wamu, who had been in that position for only 17 days, may receive a severance package of $60 million. Sign me up!!!!

So what can we do??
Spirit has put it in my head to "learn to teach".... by this, my guides mean that we are to each learn something about survival at a very basic level and then teach it to others. Community building is of paramount importance.
Today, as I sat writing an agenda for the next Powerful Human meeting, an agenda that speaks to this very idea... a new client sat at my table for a reading. She's a software engineer, a woman in her 40's who eats only meat that she hunts and fishes for herself. How's that for spirit sending someone to affirm my ideas? We spoke about the current state of affairs and my PH agenda; I gave her my card... I asked if she would teach me about fishing the lakes around here and she said she'd be more than happy to do that.
The agenda is going to address the establishment of a small co-op to buy bulk beans, rice and Quinoa. We'll talk about how to grow and preserve food.... not out of some sense of fear, but out of a desire to forge a new future built on love and mutual respect. I will teach people how to make cordage from plant fibers. Leslie will share what she knows about growing and canning food. Both of us will teach what we have learned about making healing salves, lotions and soaps. The possibilities are endless.
And all along we will pray that the circumstances of this change will be gentle, that as more and more people wake to their own power, we may not need the dramatic shift that many fear.
For now, let me leave you with some word play I love so much...
We currently live in a "society" and for me, that breaks down to a Sniveling Organism Creating Inferior Ethics That Yoke
Let's build a new "culture" which I define as Communities Utilizing Love Trust Understanding Respect & Enlightenment
Until next time... may the breath of Oya blow gently in your life!
Be Blissed for you are Love!
PH Joyce MySpace
"Where Visions Become Reality" www.powerfulhuman8.com

Oya, Mother of the Wind

This was the general horoscope for today from tarot.com...

The cautious Virgo Moon gives us a heightened ability to discriminate between which information is useful and which is not. The Moon joins restrictive Saturn and opposes progressive Uranus, foreshadowing a long-term alignment between these two conflicting giants that's exact on Election Day. We may personally feel the tension between the status quo (Saturn) and the future (Uranus). Which one prevails now or in November remains to be seen.

How's that for a co-inky-dink?

When I was going through my shaman's transformation, I was gifted with a song from one of the silly shaman I was learning from. It was a song to Oya, Mother of the Wind and one of the primary Goddesses I serve. I think the time to share it with others has arrived. I will offer the same admonishment I received when I was given the song: Please, please, please never sing/recite this while you are angry or in a place of fear. Oya's presence can be as gentle as the brush of a butterfly's wing on your cheek or She can rip your life apart on a whim. That being said, Oya is a Goddess of transformation and that is exactly what is needed at this point in time. Our economy sucks, our leaders are liars who are owned by business and ideologies have divided us. It is time to bring about a shift and this song is a wonderful tool.

Song to Oya channeled by Earil to Joyce January 1999

Oya, Mother, gentle breeze, screaming whirlwind, all of these
Bring your winds of change to me
Mercifully, gently sweep me free
From the folly surrounding me
Cut the cords where I have bound me
With your healing breath set down me
On the ground where I need to be
On the ground where I need to be
On the ground where I need to be

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Our passion for Nature, our love of Life and our commitment to Self has the power to lift us out of this mess which is about to get messier.
More to come....
Sing my friends... don't worry about the quality of your voice, just sing from the heart. Let's call the wind for it is all that will blow away the bullshit.
PH Joyce

So here's the thing....

It's been about a month since I became consistent in using Essiac tea on a daily basis, moving from 1 ounce at the start to where I am now taking 6 ounces every morning. The 6 ounce regime began about a week ago when I replaced my morning Chai or Green Tea with cold Essiac, followed by 2 ounces of mineral salt water (I am chronically dehydrated and contrary to what one might have been led to believe, mineral salt is an excellent remedy as it encourages the cells to retain fluid). About 45 minutes later, I have a smoothie that contains fruits, almond milk, Kefir and Young Living Ningxa Red (made from the wolfberry).
The effects of the all this is clearly evident to me on a cellular level... I feel so much clearer and full of life energy.... the body I once dragged, reluctantly, out of bed every morning is now teeming with energy. The herbs in the Essiac are cleaning my blood, my organs and my whole system. I'm constantly losing the interest in the old foods that contributed to my out-of-shape self. Now I want fruit, veggies and lean protein. I know that this change in my daily habits are a major factor to my new-found energy, and on a much deeper level I know it has a lot to do with all the emotional clearing I've been doing. It has been an interesting journey and one I am very glad I made.

I often find myself counseling clients on the benefits of caring for oneself and I figure if I'm going to talk the talk, I better damn well walk the talk! That's my philosophy and I'm sticking to it just as I have been sticking with my new regime of self-nourishment. For in truth, the re-action that comes as the reward for instituting new behaviors is manifold. In taking the time to feed myself well... committing to the shopping, the preparation, the loving appreciation for what I eat... all these things are being felt and acknowledged on the cellular level of my consciousness. My body finally believes it is loved for I am loving it in the simplest way I know how.
So to all of us who are taking back our power to live... I salute us! We are Powerful Humans.
And to any of you who are still sitting on the fence about conquering old habits... be they food, money, cigarettes, sex, whatever.... jump down off that fence and let's fill the world with people committed to self-awareness!!!
Be Blissed for you are Love!
PH SkyMySpace
If you have any questions about Essiac, feel free to email me.

It comes up repeatedly... the whole issue surfaces over and over. Ancient and worn, it is carried in the cells of my marrow... deep in the bones. It begs the same question over and over... plaguing me with pains, physical and otherwise. Not tremendous physical pain, just gnawing aches born of carrying something for so long. An antiquity in itself, kept alive in history books and novels and now available on dvd.... the emotional pain burns deep and strong.
With its cellular awareness nagging me.... I am given to wonder what it is that could turn the heart's of humanity to the place where they could burn another alive. What fear, what loss of love could turn a heart to such a thing?
Alien to me, this thought is burned in my memory banks... replaying a program that cannot be over-written... it has to be dumped.
As I watch the flames grow, the heat on my skin is nothing compared to the loss of air around me. What little air there is is hot and dry, burning me from the inside out... There are no tears for the heat has sucked them out of me. But now, the tears flow... compassion mingled with pain begs forgiveness for self and others.
There is alot more I will do to heal this ancient ache, and I do it with the faith that once led an army. Each breath in will no longer burn with the collective fears of humanity... we have risen and shall continue our spiral outward.... dumping old patterns into the void.
I love you all!
PH Sky

Storms Nourish

The vibrations are powerful
The wave deep
The curve steep
Arcing
Ebbing
Eternally moving
The flow
We love…

Powerful Humans
All
One being
The whole

We shift the balance
As we move through
The flow
Our home, the Love
Is within us

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Free the Kid by embracing the Truth of who you are…. Dare and Dream, Commit to Self and the Kid shall re-member you to the whole of you.
Reconnected, remembered by others, who, like shards of a mirror, reflect back the Powerful Human within you, you heal self with the power of Love. As the force of Love flows from Self, expanding from one Powerful Human to another, we witness the Whole of Creation shine forth as a radiant beam… unending, fluid and static only in its continuity.
We are rising outward.

Be Blissed!
PH Sky

Inking my life... who says I can't take it with me?

As I tend the recent addition of color that Mando skillfully added to my Phoenix tattoo the other night, it comes to mind that my ritual washing of the new ink, the applying of healing salve to soothe my skin through the metamorphosis of setting the ink... all with a mindfulness that these pictures on my body count the passages of my spirit through form...... this ritual is a silly city shaman's ceremony, affording me peace as I watch the fledgling growth of hope in a world that is beginning to suspect that 'fear' is not a healthy growing medium for humans or the earth. As the Love that has been shown and given to Gaia, our planet earth, grows in her heart so does the power of magic in this world. Use your Powerful Human power of Love to awaken those you meet my kindred, fear not for we are ONE!

Mando can be found at:
Immaculate Tattoo 1454 W. Main St. Suite #1
Mesa, AZ 85201
(480) 668-4940
Monday - Saturday 12pm to 9pm Closed Sundays

Years ago I saw a book by Harry Stein, titled: Ethics (and Other Liabilities): Trying to Live Right in an Amoral World. I didn't buy it because I understood the premise on a purely intuitive level. ironically, twenty-one years later I am still vexed by the truth of which Harry wrote. Add to this the on-going self-debate about the potential for a "holier than thou" presence within my little 'h' human self and my vexation is amplified. It gets so noisy in here on occasion that I've actually yelled: "Shut up!" to myself... but I digress.

Recently the Universe saw fit to shut me up on the "holier than thou" arguement by sending a forwarded email regarding the path of ascension many are currently walking. There it was, an electronic missive, clarifying so much. It 'fit' so well that all I can do is cut and paste here; the magnitude of the resonance still rocks me:
32. An intolerance for lower vibrational things (of the 3D) reflected in conversations, attitudes, societal structures, healing modalities, etc. They literally make you feel "sick" inside. When we begin arriving in the higher realms and in a highervibration, our energies are no longer in alignment withthe old outside 3D world. Through a severe intolerance to the old, we are being "pushed" to move forward...to be and create the New.

What was clarified was the reason for my distaste with the commericalization of spirit in this "new age"...... (glad to be able to spit that flavor out)

In 1987, on the last day of the Harmonic Convergence, I stepped out of the car on Airport Mesa, Sedona, AZ and I struggled with anger and frustration when I saw the trash defiling a sacred spot. The festivities over, the vendors had departed, leaving shit in their wake. Blissfuly, the voice of Gaia, my sister earth, spoke within my heart and I was able to rise above the squallor and find a spot on which to rest my warrior's soul. It was only a few months later that I saw Harry Stein's book.

During the ensuing years I have grown amused by the marketing and bandwagon approach some 'new agers' have taken on this journey we are on. I am still on my own path, unearthing my truth by my own labor; earning my keep by serving others via the gifts the Goddess entrusted to my keeping. And I know that I can no more heal someone than I can take them across a threshold to another dimension. Those journeys are singular and must be made alone and within the confines of our own unique consciousness.

(more to come)

Oya, Blessed One.

Daughter of the Moon. A glimmer of reflected light... only knowing darkness within.
Child of Chaos. A limitless confine... where polarities are balanced.
Student of mystery. At home with the unknown... the solitude supports me.

The dark expanse of unbounded potential where ALL is possible... this is my nesting ground, my within....

I move through the place defined by the sons of man... again they stir the well of chaos. Creation moves within the starry realms and ancient memories rise within me. Sentinels and vanguards search the darkness to find the source of the swirling.

Blade I am... forged by water's fire. Unsheathed I am... tempered at Love's forge. I rest when I can... pledged to Love's service, I do what I must.
The heart of Gaia, my sister, holds fast to mine. In the healing of my own wounds... I find her immortality. In silent resolve, she and I move within the stirrings.... the sons of man know not what they see when we glide by. A seeming glimpse of light... sparking a memory within their beings. The story changes here... NOW!

Child I am.... forged, formed and tempered by Love's hand. Ancient and inviolate... I cast Love's wake in my movement.

To the desolate, hope.
To the wounded, healing.
To the ends of time.... Love be your companion.

Gifts given freely

At a time when I really needed to know that in fact, love did exist in this world, I was hanging out with my spirit brother, Johnathan, at a small water hole, beneath a culvert along a country road. During the beastly Summer months in a small upstate city in New York, we would religiously escape the hot pavement for this small place where runoff from streams afforded us a place to literally chill out. The added bonus of this oasis was that the place was ripe with the most amazing rocks; with fossils galore beneath our feet, we always spent time rock hunting. Well this one particular day we were sitting on some larger rocks, splashing our feet in the cold water and I happen to look down to my right and find this awesome rock that I knew had been a perfect heart.... if not for the bottom point which had been broken off. I mused aloud to Johnathan about how cool it would be to have seen it before the piece came off. We were both amazed at the shape of it so I resolved to take it home with me... a treasure of great wealth for it was a gift, given freely, by my sister Earth. Ten minutes could not have passed when my left hand, as if moved my some other will than my own, moved to pick up another rock. You got... it was the bottom of the heart. Both Johnathan and I, well schooled in the ways of magic, were still completely awed by such an event. The heart stone came home with me and has since been the central point of an altar.
Through the years, it has mirrored other heartbreaks I have endured... it now is now 4 pieces rather than 2 and my human heart is only a little worse for the wear. I am loathe to encase it for safety, but I worry how many more breaks it can withstand before it crumbles... returning to the dust it once was. And so it is that I walk this physical world... heart unshielded for it must be free, yet like my heartstone.... it is vunerable and, although the wounds are not mortal, they are deep and painful. Allowing the force of Love to heal me, I retreat to Nature.

Events and Triggers

The Sun's annual passage over my Sun, Moon and Venus..... known by Astrologers as a "transit"... has been quite powerful this year. All 3 of those major planets in my birth (natal) chart are extremely close to each other, separated by only minor degrees and they pack a mighty influence into a small space. The Moon sits in my 6th house of service and predisposes me to work as a source of emotional outlet.... I love to serve, it's the main reason I spent almost 30 years in food service. The Sun, Venus and Mercury all sit in my 7th house of close personal partnerships, ranging from love to business. They are all in the sign of Taurus... a sign of patience beyond human limits, Taureans are natural caregivers, loyal friends and steadfast partners.
With the Sun in the place it is, I experience a very challenging aspect from Pluto, who is the ruler of my chart (Scorpio rising). As this as yearly transit occurs, the tension is quite intense. Pluto calls for transformation of the energy, thereby enabling growth. It is growth that is always hard-won and always involves other people (7th house). And the scenario is generally the same... with variations on a theme. There is inevitably a breach of confidence involved... or there are glaring discrepancies between parties that I am involved with, placing me in a position where I do not know who to believe because in my complete naivete, I tend to believe what people tell me. I mean I don't fall for out and out bullshit, but I tend to give everyone the benefit of the doubt. I remember what it was like to feel so insignificant that I had to fabricate stories about myself to justify my existence.
So here I sit, one week after my 59th birthday... watching the same experience play out with different players and I am left to wonder what lesson I am missing. I don't violate confidences anymore... it's been decades since I fell prey to that behavior. I still hold to the reality that when there is a glaring difference in 2 individual perspectives of a story, only the 2 involved will know the truth. The only lesson that strikes any chord resonates with my desire to run off and seclude myself from human behavior. I feel no stress from birds, animals, plants, insects... only from humans. But that is not a feasible possibility for the call to serve is strong and as an individual who's call to service is evident in more than one way, I must honor what I came here to do. So I shall follow the advice given to me many Moons ago; I will be in the world, but not of it. My detachment is a safety net, the lifeline that will keep me sane until the Sun moves into Leo this July.... then I will duck and cover.

Resurrection

Once beset by a longing so passionate and fierce I almost consumed my being to ease the ache of it….. Seeking to obliterate the pain that defined the longing, like fighting fire with fire, I desperately tore at myself before I surrendered. The Warrior I am … the Lover I am … heart and mind, divided… moved from battleground to battleground trying to resolve the differences… one by force, one by flow, equal in strength. It was not until one was so deeply wounded that the other began to understand. The instant that understanding and that recognition dawned, the battlegrounds transformed….. the lightness of this transformation illuminated a tender seed, fragile, but viable. For all the while heart and mind bickered and moaned, while one part of me tore at another, the spirit seed of longing managed to stay alive within me. Then last Summer, during a Full Moon eclipse, with the service of two loving beings I laid upon a desert hilltop and birthed that spirit seed into ritual space. The sprit seed within me now lives as a tree ripe with fruit…. my labor fulfilled, I count the blessings of those whom I love and they who love me, as evidence that the peace tree lives in this realm too.

20 years in training. Learning to craft a life out of what I had both within my being and reach…….

It stuck me as fanciful the other day when I related to another PH that I was able to spin rope from plant fiber and that I wanted to look into playing with the desert devas so they could teach me about the plant life in the desert. How wonderful it is to be able share the pleasure of getting to know the native plants of your landscape with a community of like-minded spirits.
It pleases me to know I can be of value to kindred souls, for in tending to both their needs and the needs of my Sister, Gaia I am living the life of a Crone in service to She who formed us. For me, there is no worthier life, nor is there anything more worth doing than sharing what you love to do with those you love.
I am gifted in so many ways.

Service is an expression of love. It is how we let LOVE know that we cherish the gift that it is.

Service begins with the Self, the truth of who we each are at our core, our own Powerful source. I’ve recently begun a new pattern of ritualized behavior… actively overwriting the programs installed by external influences. Influences that caused me to overeat the foods that did me the least good and an internal urge to take on way more than I needed to take on in terms of physical, mental and emotion behaviors that overtaxed body, mind and soul; all manifestations of a lack of self-respect.
This service to Self is beneficial on many levels. In feeding myself wholesome and natural foods I send a powerful message to the cells of my body. As a result, I feel better physically and subsequently I am mentally at peace and emotionally centered. In directing this Self love on the lower self, I am instilling in the cells of creation the energy of LOVE.
In the ritualized salt baths I have begun taking I am sending a powerful message that I cherish my body enough to clear it of the lower vibrations I can absorb by being in the world of little ‘h’ human nature.

For the love of PH8

Reader advisement: As a dutiful child of Chaos I often mix metaphors, blur lines of demarcation and bend rules when it serves the flow. Sky

There was a time when hope was just a word and the thought of joy, a torment. Finding my way back to a centered Self, the Powerful Human within, has rewarded me by returning the rose-colored glasses that I was told to remove in my early teens. Being a bit of a walking paradox from the get-go, the rebellious teen in me obeyed a father who could not deal with the imaginative flights of fancy that filled much of my time. I loved him as I loved life, but it was usually my experience that at some point or another, on any given day, he would vehemently demand that I get my head out of the clouds, plant my feet on the ground and, “for Christ’s sake, take off the damn rose-colored glasses”. He believed this to be in my best interests because the world was neither “fair” nor “ideal” and to be sure, I’m certain his world wasn’t. However, the one I recalled with every fiber of my being told me that life is indeed fair and ideal. My child-like self knew, and still knows, that life is love and love is both fair and ideal.
In my view, balanced and loving intent shape the world, but my father’s generation didn’t believe they had a choice in the matter. They had seen much of the shittiest intent of mankind, as did my generation, the “hippies”. The difference is, I’m certain, a naturally occurring phenomenon, one as steadying the cycle of Nature. It is Nature’s nature to be cyclic and even as a wild, immature and rebellious teen, I knew this to be true.

Yet, my father loved me, although for years I would deny that idea, believing myself an unworthy recipient of such emotion. Like many in his time, my father didn’t have the means of expressing his love in any other manner so, in retrospect, I really do believe that he did think he had my best interests at heart. He was fond of telling me “the road to hell is paved with good intention” however, I don’t buy into the concept of hell, so it held little weight with me. His methods were skewed, but his heart was in the right place, so after a time I was able to find forgiveness…. for both of us. It was hidden behind the brick wall that had been built between us; some bricks had been his, some mine.

As a child, I had pretty much lived up to the name I had chosen for myself… Joyce was joyous most of the time. But taking off those metaphorical rose-colored glasses began a thirty-five year bout with depression, issues of self-worth, self-loathing and eventually an almost complete loss of hope. Journeying through what others deemed “reality” charted the course through a bumpy life journey that has eventually taken me ‘home’. Along the way I learned that I have no one to blame but myself and as a result, I am so done with that behavior.

Musings….
There were days in the beginning of the journey when I would lie on my bed and cry. When asked why I was crying, I could only respond that I wanted to go “home”… home to that elusive place where I instinctively knew that love did not hurt. Those episodes established the parameters that would later define me as a “dust mote circling around the fuzz-balls who hang out on the fringe of life”. Always the odd one in a cluster of misfits, it’s where I feel most comfortable. I can join in, but having accepted the idea that our basic commonality is our uniqueness, I don’t want to become a copy of others. I am complete within myself. In that lesson I found I don’t need to sit and cry for ‘home’ any longer, gone are the days of feeling sorry for myself. I cried a river of tears and journeyed to the darkest part of the ocean where I once again found my voice. How’d I get from there to here? By refusing to give in to the fear, by facing the pain and by embracing my rage. I faced the Dark Goddess, donned Her essence as my own and claimed the pain as a tool for change.

Sekhmet
The world’s sorrow, carried with joy, was lifted
The Earth’s sadness, humbly felt, was eased
The connection to creation, always there, though sometimes lost
Is once more recalled
Sekhmet beckoned
Awaiting the precise moment, knowing I was ready
She emerged
With Her offering, I let go of all I had held
The strength of desires, a fierce calling
The lure of vices, a power welling up
A yielding to Her, timidly undertaken, not wanting to burden
Is a blessing to my soul

And so my dance within the darkness was the illumination I sought, the light to guide me home.

I consider myself an artist and, for me, an artful life is about spiritual alchemy… the transmutation of base emotions to pure gold. The elevation of one’s emotions from the whining of the inner brat to the reclamation of the divine joy is the truth of a unified self and the alchemical reaction to profound spiritual pain. I still cry, weary of the pain… but it is the pain of others that elicits that response now. I weep for the world, for the pain others need a break from carrying. See, when I took the glasses off and removed my head from the clouds I ran to the safety of nature and planted my feet in the soil of this realm. The scent of moss and dark earth became the comforts that eased the shock of my transition and I became one with the flesh of this world. In so doing, I connected myself to the element that is closest to the core of who I am as a human… the element that is the building block of all humans.

Gaia, my sister, the living earth became my anchor to joy. However, the cruelty of “human nature” chipped away at the anchor until all that remained was a shred of hope, the one I clung to fiercely. The “shred of hope” was the solace and all I needed to do was to listen for the voice of spirit and transcribe that voice into this world. That, at least, provided a purpose to my stay here in this dense realm. Now I shed more tears of JOY & GRATITUDE and find myself so lovingly blest.
So my father's admonishment to plant my feet on the ground was a boon to finding my way home again... and although the moments leading here can be heavy, I found that with my feet firmly planted, I could more easily reach for the sky!!!

The Her-story of us....

And so they remained on a dying world as billions of lights spiraled all around them weaving a new world of love, a new home. The ones left to witness the death were those who had killed the world… the ones who had drained the life of love right out of it. And the beauty of the event lived in the fact that the plastic people would never know that they would finish out their time on a plastic world.
The “plastic world” had been lovingly woven strand by strand. Years in the making, it was made manifest by every Heyoka, Coyote & Discoridain void tech that knows how to reach beneath the layers of 'reality' and flow within the confines of non-space. Devotees of LOVE in its purest form, they became the woof and warp upon the loom of She Who Is, the Mother Primordial, the consummate Creatrix. As Her children had chosen to serve, so did She choose them to receive Her blessings.